mrs. treasures website

What is the marian principle?

It is a theory that I coined to help a person who has suffered many forms of abuses in their lives.  It involves connecting to Mary and having a devotion to knowing her.

Unfortunately, since Mary is well respected and adored in the Catholic spirituality, Mary is very much downplayed in many other religion.

If you have been abused in the past and those abuses are still manifested in your life through depression, feelings of emptiness, passive anger… then you are just surviving.  You have not yet healed.  I am sure that you go through periods of closeness to God and absence of God in your lives.

A common therapeutic approach to those suffering from depression to find a “person” that you trust that you can tell what you feel.   The person you selected must be non-judgmental.  If you cannot find that person in your family and social circle, you are advised to go into therapy.

This is what happens when you take the worldly approach to your healing.  You spend money and your time in the realm of psychology and psychiatry.  But, your progress is slow and inconsistent.  It also becomes frustrating because you scheduled therapy sessions cannot keep up with the intensity of your emotional problems.

Those people I have met rely heavily on their devotion to the Blessed Mother to heal from their trauma.  Otherwise, they all have risk factors to suffer from such a debilitating illness such as Borderline Personality Disorder.

There is a lady, she is around in her mid-60s, who was sexually molested by her cousins while she was growing up.  She was also physically and emotionally abused by her own biological mother.  Well, she connected to the Blessed Mother and requested her to be her mother.  She became closer to God, Jesus and the Catholic Faith in the process.

Contrary to what other religion to think, Mary will always lead you to Jesus.  It is odd for them to understand.  But the “Marian principle” is the secret of many Saints who grew to love Jesus, our Lord.  Mary is the mother of Jesus, and to know Jesus is to know that she holds a special place in His heart.  To think that Mary was just simply “human” and filled without grace, is not logically accurate.  How could Jesus come from a simple woman?  Mary was chosen, among women, and filled with much grace to carry the Savior in her womb.

If you are emotionally depressed or suffering from a disorder, seek a connection with Mary.  She will always lead you to Jesus.

“Your actions towards your RAD children may seem very small and ordinary, but if you do it with love, it gets pleasing and powerful”.  In my heart, I heard God say this to me tonight when I visited the Adoration Chapel.  I asked him to talk to me.

A few days ago,  I had a very long discussion with my 17 yo about many things until it went to her sensitive spots.  It was just so irresistably to pry deeply to her problems.  We parents seek that and we end up with worse that what we expect to hear.

She felt misunderstood though I had to admit, I knew I was very articulate and clear.  On her part, I felt she misunderstood my actions towards her in the past, but I knew she was clear too.

But, somewhere along the lines we  are airing out some “hurts” in our relationship and we both seek understanding and we ended up with more heartaches.

When you start worrying about the final outcome of your conversation with your child, it would feel that you will lose the battle. In dealing with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), it will never an easy battle.

I think it is important to wear your “Spiritual Glasses” to see where the real foe is hiding.  Your enemy is not your RAD child.  Your enemy is the spiritual foe of mankind.  The one that will continually tell you lies about your RAD child.  It is the same foe that will continually tell lies to your RAD child about you.  If you will entangle yourself in this snare, you will not achieve anything with your RAD child.  Both of you will add tons of resentments that will be bottled up in your heart.

Thus, it is very important that you do not give up, even if you feel like giving up on your RAD child.  To feel frustrated is to be human, but to give up and lose your compassion for your RAD child is what the enemy wants you to do.  Your RAD child wants to give up on you too, because your RAD child feels misunderstood.

Because of my inner call to God to assist me, my husband strategically arrived at home.  From then on, he was able to continue our discussion with our daughter.  It was not easy.  It was not to prove her wrong, and prove us right.  We stayed with her for a few more hours, risking our original plan because we love her enough.

And, this is what God told me tonight.  God only needs us to “love” these children in our own unique ways and He will give us the power to see the “foe and where it is hiding”.  He will make us understand that what we need for this child is more than we can humanly think is possible.

God’s love conquers everything.  If we can imitate Him and apply the same Love to our children, no matter how unlovable they appear to be…  no matter how small our actions are, it is very pleasing to our Lord.  And, the Lord will give us the grace to bear this all.